How do you start your kids day? What are your parental advice to your kids that keeps them in a positive state of mind? For my boys, I motivate and encourage them throughout the day but I try to start and end their day on a positive note. A method that is proven to be effective is Positive Self Affirmation. Both of my kids have different personalities and temperament so i am strategic in the techniques i develop and use to empower each child.
What is Self Affirmation
Self Affirmation can be both negative and positive. It is when a child declares their worthiness and values to themselves which can either decrease or increase their confidence and self-esteem. (https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/selfaffirmation#:~:text=%3A%20the%20act%20of%20affirming%20one's,proud%20of%2C%20such%20as%20a). Affirmations are proven methods to self improvement because it acts as an agent in rewiring our brains by forming clusters of positive thoughts (Dr. Carmen Harra, 2018). Negative affirmation is typically the narrative a child develops of themselves based on how others defined them. The negative information is then transmitted into the child's brain, it plays like a tune, lingers into the psyche and then the process of repetition activates it until the child begins to believe and become it. However, I believe it's our responsibility as parents to dismantle the negative notions, break the cycle and reprogram their minds by uplifting them with positive words to increase their confidence and self-esteem.
I can be anything i want to be.
Mistakes help me to grow
I have a purpose.
I am significant
I am smart.
I will not give up
I am wonderfully made
I am in control of my destiny
Whatever I put effort into I will get positive results
I am going to have a wonderful day today 😁
Why Promote Positive Self Affirmation in Kids
As humans we are prone to attach ourselves to what others define us to be. We attach negative statements and beliefs on ourselves as parents and unintentionally we project it upon our kids so then they develop these habits and begin to define themselves in the same spectrum. Children personalize what is said to them or around them and so we are to be mindful of the negative affirmation we are instilling in our kids through our words and actions. “No one likes me”, “you make me upset”, "you are bad", "your up to no good", "I can't do it", or a big one is "I give up" as innocent as we think these phrases are they demeanor the character of our kids. Our kids begin to develop these false identity of themselves and so i believe it's important to promote Positive Self affirmation to re-frame their minds and help them develop positive traits that exhibits good behavior to themselves and others. Developing a Positive self affirmation tool that allows your child to be empowered can help and aid when faced with hardship at school, in relationships, on the job and in their everyday life. Positive Self affirmation helps kids develop confidence, a sense of worthiness and self love.
Self-Esteem Development in Kids is Important for the Future
Building a child’s self-esteem helps with their overall confidence, they begin to believe in themselves and their abilities. With a positive outlook on life and themselves our kids will be capable of formulating alternative ideas and plans to execute whatever task they embark upon. Building kids self-esteem develops their confidence to overcome challenges and cope with mistakes. If faced with difficulty they are not discouraged but instead motivated to achieve greatness. Self-esteem development begins from our kids are babies. We facilitate in the growth of our child's self-esteem by nurturing them, providing them with love, care and acknowledging their achievements. Responding positively to a child’s progress or success in life contributes to their self-esteem development. As kids grow up they accomplish many milestones such as taking their first step, talking, riding a bike for their first time, graduating High school, College/University to landing their first job. These are very important achievements in their lives that deserves acknowledgement and as their parents our positive reaction to them will encourage and motivate them to further achieve their goals.
The Important of Building Confidence in a Child
Building a child's confidence is teaching them to love, appreciate themselves and trust in their abilities. It is important because they will begin to believe in themselves and their potential. When our kids develop confidence they will know their worth and not settle for less than what they deserve in their daily life and relationships. As they grow up they will begin to have a positive outlook on life and accomplish task that they try.
Steps to Creating Positive Self Affirmation
When developing a Positive Self Affirmation it is imperative that we write it in the present tense as noted in "4 Tips For Teaching Children Affirmations For Self-Esteem". To find out how to formulate a self affirmation tool that will be effective for your child you can read the article written by Yanique S Chambers, A Licensed Clinical Social Worker on the kiddie matters web-page (https://www.kiddiematters.com/4-tips-teaching-children-affirmations/). In the article it outlines in detail the best method to apply when formulating the Self Affirmation tool.
Tweak the Positive Self Affirmation Tool based on your child's needs. As specific areas develop overtime update the Positive self affirmation tool to work on areas that needs development. I believe this method is beneficial for our kids growth and future success.
Please comment and share other ideas or what has worked for you. What method have you used to motivate and encourage your child to become successful in life?
The Joy of Parenting is enjoying all aspects of our kids life while learning and creating ways to empower them and to see them flourish and develop into strong, confident and successful Individuals.
~Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it
(Proverbs 22;6, KJV ).~