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Unconditional Love and Parenting

Becoming a mother seemed easy and fun. Responsibility didn't seem like much, looking from the outside. I knew it took a lot of selfless acts and dedication, but it never dawned on me the amount of commitment it took and the changes that had to occur to become effective at parenting. However, I did know that I would show my children, unconditional love. After five years of parenting, I've come to realize that being a parent requires a lot more than hugs, kisses and the "I love you." Being a parent requires unconditional love when dealing with dedication, commitment, discipline, and consistency.

What is Unconditional Love?

Unconditional love has no boundaries or conditions. It's a love that's pure. But this love gets tested, and our kids are sure to put us to the test. They will push our buttons and stretch our limits as far as possible to see how we react. However, to love someone unconditionally means to love without limits, boundaries or expectations. It's a type of love we all desire either from our spouse, kids, family and friends. Unconditional love accepts all the flaws, mistakes and imperfections.

Why It's Important to Give Unconditional Love To Your Children?

Unconditional love is important, as it sets a foundation for the child to structure their future life around. Unconditional love is a type of love that no matter how your child behaves or what path they choose, you still provide the proper love and support to guide them throughout life. This type of love is a selfless act and produces a healthy response in kids. Unconditional love is essential in a child's mental and physical development. It plays an integral role in developing their self-esteem.

Unconditional Love Wrapped In Dedication and Commitment.

Unconditional love is not easy; it requires dedication, staying the course and not giving up on your child because they haven't reached or achieved the things you expected. It's giving up the late-night parties, leisure times and sleeping in on weekends. Dedication and commitment is hating your job but knowing you can't afford to quit because you now have a tiny human to take care of. All the things you enjoyed are on pause, and time is now dedicated to taking care of the child.

Once you have dedicated yourself to being a full-time parent, you become committed to your child. This type of commitment takes unconditional love. That even when our kids become challenging and make decisions that block or hinder their growth, we would still provide them with love and be there when needed. Some parents believe once their child becomes an adult, they are no longer in the parenting role. But, parenting doesn't end when our kids become adults. Unlike most jobs, this one lasts a lifetime. There's no turning back once you give birth. You have signed on to a lifetime of parenting, which may include a rollercoaster of emotions, such as; happiness, disagreements, playful attitudes, disappointments, joy, anger and feelings of entitlement that sometimes end with "I hate you"; once discipline is added to the equation.

"How Can You Love Me and Discipline Me All At The Same Time?".

No one truly wants to be told what to do, and kids do not understand that discipline is done all out of love. For some parents, discipline comes naturally, and for others, there's a sense of fear; fear of your child feeling unloved, fear of failure and not having a good relationship with your child. However, through discipline, a child develops and learns to have respect, boundaries and self-control. As a child adventures through life, they will make mistakes and learn from them and understand that the rules were to help, not harm them. But to be successful in discipline, it will take being consistent and standing your ground.

Maintaining Consistency and Still, Show Unconditional Love.

When I say "Consistency," it sounds so simple, yet for me, it is one of the most challenging tasks in parenting. However, consistency is essential when it comes to maintaining discipline. Children like routines and thrive better from them. What makes consistency difficult is the ability to commit and follow through with what you say. We tend to focus on the struggles of being consistent instead of the results. When a baby is screaming naturally, we would pick that child up and console them because a quiet baby sounds better than a screaming one. If a child is constantly seeking negative attention, it is best to reinforce the behavior by not picking them up; this helps the child develop self-control.

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